elf: Rainbow sparkly fairy (rainbow fairy)
[personal profile] elf posting in [community profile] spiritual_woo
Not my spiritual growth; [livejournal.com profile] icarusancalion's.

My way: by Michelle Grissom, formerly ani Dechen Drolma

"My real name is Michelle Grissom, formerly Ani Dechen Drolma. I wish that I could reach every person who has read or heard of The Buddha From Brooklyn, or who has heard the slander I've spread through blogs and as Longchenpa on Wikipedia -- now being helplessly replicated everywhere against my will -- because I lied."

and

"If you would like to help -- PLEASE DO LINK TO THIS POST.

There are people who are using my past words and my RL name to continue to lambast Jetsunma. If this post is linked to and has hits, it will show up in the search and mitigate what I've done."

This is what growth looks like. It looks *painful*, this baring of past wrongs to friends and strangers. It's a delicate dance, trying to say both, "don't look at me; pay attention to these wise and generous people I've hurt," and also, "umm, I screwed up, and you should be aware of that."

Anyone active in the LJ wankstorms knows that any truly remorseful apologies are met with "aww, shucks, you're okay; glad you're better now"--and trying to avoid sympathy comments takes a delicate balance, takes work to throw the focus back on the message and not the messenger. She manages; her personal history, while intrinsic to the message, is shoved in as necessary background details that hold together "The Story Of Wrongs Done To Jetsunma (by me)" instead of "What I Did Wrong (to Jetsunma) and How I Am A Better Person Now."

I'm in awe of Icarus; I don't know if I've ever, or could ever, make a post like that. I know I should mostly be focused on the wisdom & compassion of her teachers... but I've met many wise & compassionate spiritual teachers, and they didn't get that way by needing public acclaim from strangers on the internet.

They do, occasionally, need help fighting off slander and bigotry, and linking to accurate history can help with that. Hence this post.

Go read. Ponder.
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